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Post by Cyrus on Nov 7, 2005 21:15:44 GMT -5
Asian guy "Japan is for faggots." geek "How can you deny your heritage like that?" Asian guy "I'm Korean you asshole!" Black geek "Oh Shit, those are two different places?" chugworth.com/comic.php?id=245When you kill one, it is a tragedy; But when you kill ten million, it is a statistic. -Josef Stalin
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Post by Cyrus on Nov 8, 2005 16:05:34 GMT -5
Me and a friend were up at midnight once and we got bored so we decided to play a random D&D game.
Friend "Ok You walk into a room with a bed and a closet." Me "Monster under the bed, I look in the closet" Friend "Damn, ok in the closet you see clothes." Me "Push the clothes out of the way" Friend "you see the back of the closet" Me "push the back of the closet" Friend "Damn you, ok you see an army of Orcs about to attack you" Me "I hide behind a rock" Friend "there are no rocks" Me "then I'll make one" Friend "Damn you again"
Me looking through the monster Manuel "Hey there are dinosaurs in here" Friend "Ya their too strong for you" Ma "But your gonna help me kill it" Friend looks at me and the says "Ok lets go kill a Brontosaurus"
Friend "You walk into town what do you do" me "go to the bar" Friend "Ok now what" Me "I get drunk" Friend "Ok, now lets roll dice to see if you get laid" *rolls dice* Friend "Congratulations you are now laid"
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Post by Ryu the Perv on Nov 8, 2005 17:56:32 GMT -5
"The only way to stop temptation is to give into it." -Ryu's Friend Mason-
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Post by NeoEllis on Nov 9, 2005 16:29:29 GMT -5
"About 4 months ago we got a brand new teacher, an American, who I will refer to as Elvis to protect his identity. Elvis's apartment is right next to a big video shop. Within his first couple of weeks here he went over and took out a membership. Not having recieved his Gaijin card yet, he gave them his company card with the company phone number and address on it as identification. If you are ever in this situation, never do that. If you have no other choice but to do that, do not rent porn. If you absolutely have to rent porn, don't rent embarrasing high school girl lesbian gang bang porn. If someone is holding a gun to your head and strenuously demanding that you rent embarassing high school girl lesbian gang bang porn and you absolutely have no other choice, then for god's sake make sure you return that video on time. Because people who work at video stores are mostly minimum wage earning 20 year olds who don't care if they get fired and like to make their own fun by, say, sending form letters to foreigner's workplaces that explicitly ask why "Lesbo high school Girl gang bang princesses 4: Hiroko's Revenge" has not been returned at the agreed upon time. Thus, on a Tuesday morning like any other Elvis came into work and was met with what one must imagine to have been the most awkward situation in his life when several members of the all female Japanese staff, having opened the letter from the video shop which wasn't addressed specifically to him (those irrepressible video shop clerks at work again), told him that he owed a late fee to the video store because "Lesbo High School Girl Gang Bang Princesses 4: Hiroko's Revenge" was 3 days late. Since then, Elvis's schedule is stacked mainly with classes full of middle aged salary men."
-senseiman, LetsJapan.org
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Post by Craze on Nov 9, 2005 19:42:39 GMT -5
"I am the eater of souls!!!" -Cosplayer
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Post by Ryu the Perv on Nov 10, 2005 22:03:37 GMT -5
"Girls are like potato chips... It's hard to have just one!!!" -Ryu-
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Post by Craze on Nov 13, 2005 19:16:39 GMT -5
"My tree uses chop sticks."
-Little scout
"Ya'know, I would call you a dork...but you're actually hitting the notes right."
-A Navy person, as I was playing a DDR arcade machine in a bowling alley in a Navy base
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Post by Craze on Nov 17, 2005 19:00:25 GMT -5
It's just plain sad for I wonder what little kids in the pokemon universe have to deal with:
Mother: "So what do you want to be when you grow up?" Child: "I want to be a lawyer." Mother: "No, you won't be a lawyer! You'll be pokemon trainer, you hear me?!" Child: *whimpering*
I mean, that's almost the only job they have in that universe other than a police person, a nurse, or a bum.
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Post by Ryu the Perv on Nov 18, 2005 23:31:33 GMT -5
Hey look, It's FEMA Fix Everything? My Ass!!!
-Ryu's Friend Ben-
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Post by Craze on Nov 21, 2005 17:22:07 GMT -5
"What are you doing?" "Filming this dead bird." "...Why?" "Because it's beautiful."
-American Beauty
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Post by Craze on Nov 29, 2005 21:32:20 GMT -5
[David and Caleb are playing Pokemon. David's pokemon deals a good a bit of damage.] David: It was super effective. Caleb: Fuck you!!!
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Post by NeoEllis on Nov 29, 2005 22:40:23 GMT -5
"Shake off all the fears of servile prejudices, under which weak minds are servilely crouched. Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call on her tribunal for every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear." -Thomas Jefferson
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Post by Craze on Dec 4, 2005 0:07:31 GMT -5
[Ben1 and student from another school pass by eachother on a football game:] Student: "Loser." Ben1: "Inbred."
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Post by Craze on Dec 4, 2005 17:32:32 GMT -5
Someone's sign at a football game:
"Go Saints! Use Cheat Codes!"
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Post by NeoEllis on Dec 6, 2005 17:45:28 GMT -5
"Tacos? Yeah, I'll go check for tacos."
-me
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